As we understand the topic of emotional intelligence, self-awareness stands out as the key foundational concept that all others are built upon. We must be self-aware in order to be successful in business, and in life. An important area of self-awareness is mindset. How do we look at the world? How do we view events and situations that happen to us on a daily basis? We would all like to think that we have a “learner” mindset; that is, we approach situations with an open mind, looking for growth opportunities in challenges, and continually questioning our role in events so that we can learn from them. However, many of us tend to fall into the “judger” mindset; that is, looking to blame others, making assumptions and being critical when the going gets tough.
Picture this….you’re diligently working on a project and are very pleased with the progress you’re making. Suddenly you get a call from your boss. He is in a panic because one of your co-workers’ has “screwed something up again,” and needs you to fix it, “IMMEDIATELY!” In that moment, what thoughts go through your head? Judger thoughts sound like, – Why is this happening to me today? Why is my boss such an over-reactive jerk? Why does he always make me fix everyone else’s mistakes? Doesn’t he know I have my own work to do? I can’t stand this place!
Sound familiar? It is so easy to get sucked into a judger mentality. Next time things don’t go as planned, try taking a deep breath and intentionally asking yourself some learner questions… What happened? What can I do to help? What’s useful about this? What can I learn from this situation? What’s best to do now? What’s possible? It takes practice, but the potential outcome for you and your organization, may be greater than you could ever imagine. Try it!!